March 14, 2003

Parsing the Chick's Cheeping

Dixie Chicks singer Natalie Maines is trying to undo the damage done by her rude slam of President Bush in front of a London audience. Here is here statement - and the between-the-lines translation:

What she said:

As a concerned American citizen, I apologize to President Bush because my remark was disrespectful. I feel that whoever holds that office should be treated with the utmost respect. We are currently in Europe and witnessing a huge anti-American sentiment as a result of the perceived rush to war. While war may remain a viable option, as a mother, I just want to see every possible alternative exhausted before children and American soldiers' lives are lost. I love my country. I am a proud American.

As an American citizen concerned that I just put millions of dollars in future earnings at risk, I apologize to President Bush because my disrespectful remark has angered country music fans all across America and I respect the fact that radio stations are pulling the Chicks off the air, fans are destroying Chicks records and, while I thank God I waited to insert my booted foot in my mouth until after we sold $49 million worth of summer concert tour tickets, I know we're going to be hurt financially long term if I don't fix the situation. We are currently in Europe, playing concerts for fans who paid a lot of money for tickets and a lot of them are having anti-American feelings right now, and we're from Texas so I took a gratuitous slap at President Bush in order to ingratiate myself further with our European cash-cow fans. While war may remain a viable option, our viability as a hit country band back in the states is less certain. I just want to exhaust every possible alternative to keep us from losing sales to American children and American soldiers. I love my country - where else could a fat chick like me make a zillion dollars singing other people's songs. I am a proud American. So please welcome us home. Please...